The Beginning...

Blogging has helped me through some of the toughest times in my life. An outlet to vent without judgement from others. A place so that I can look back in a year or ten and realize how far I have come. Currently, I'm struggling with a beast I have never met before. This beasts name is "Infertility". I'm sharing this in hopes that others who have fought the battle will have some insight and that others who may struggle will know they are not alone.

When I was 19, I became pregnant. It was a complete surprise and I miscarried. My ex husband deployed to Iraq 3 months later. On his R&R, I became pregnant again without trying and we have Tyler. In late 2006- we started trying to conceive (TTC) another baby. I got pregnant in 1-2 months but miscarried on New Year's Eve. Again, shortly after I became pregnant and we had Kallie.

Fast forward 5 years.....
I had my Mirena IUD removed on January 9, 2013 in the OR because it was imbedded. The surgical removal went well. My menstrual cycle returned and I thought things were headed in the right direction. After months of failing to become pregnant while charting basal body temps (BBT) and cervical mucous (CM), I began to realize that there was a problem.

My cycle started getting shorter--from 28 days to only 25-26. I started spotting at 5-6 days past ovulation (5-6dpo). That gave me a luteal phase (LP) of only 8-9 days. An LP that short is not long enough to give a fertilized egg time to implant.  I saw my GYN and had my thyroid checked. All came back fine. I then requested that my progesterone levels be checked on cycle day (cd) 21. Those labs came back and indicated that I was not ovulating. On the contrary, my bbt chart shows that I was with a sustained temp rise. So, I was diagnosed as having a progesterone deficiency which causes the luteal phase defect (LPD). Thankfully, we have doctors here who will recognize a problem and handle it--whether you've been TTC for 3 months or 3 years. They understand the agonizing "wait" and how stressful it can be to get a BFN month after month.

It was comforting but also saddening to know WHAT the problem was. Not knowing would have been worse, because at least we could come up with a plan.  I may have had a progesterone deficiency when I miscarried twice before and it is getting worse as I get older--which is why it has caused the LPD now instead of just the progesterone drop which would lead to the miscarriage. Who knew that 29 would be a time when my fertility would be such a problem. I'm thankful that I have 2 children already, and that my life played out the way it did because if I had waited until 30 or 35, I may not have children at all.

I was prescribed 50mg Clomid to take on cd3-7 to try to strengthen my ovulation so that the fertilized egg can create enough of it's own progesterone to implant. The risk of twins doubles from 3-5% to 6-10%. Not a huge number in my mind, and while I am not hoping for twins- we will gratefully take whatever God gives us.

So begins our journey...